Wednesday, 1 September 2010

Time is making fools of us again.

YOU GUYS. This summer I totally crossed my heart, hoped to die, motherfucking PINKY SWORE that I’d go see some movies. In the movie theater. Specifically Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World and Piranha 3D. And I didn’t. At all. Not even once. I AM SO SORRY THAT I’M A BIG FAT LIAR, JOE.

So I’d like to say that boy oh boy I’m a-gonna see the shit out of the fall movies this year, but let’s face it, I will not. Because I suck. No wait, no I don’t! (Well, much anyway.) I’m just very, very, very, very busy. Doing what? I HAVE NO IDEA. But the minutes, they fall through the hourglass like the sands of time, and then the hourglass gets knocked off the shelf because Winston is being a GIANT ASSHOLE and then the hourglass breaks and the sand gets, just, everywhere, and then I have to pull out the vacuum and clean up the mess and once I have the vacuum out I figure I might as well vacuum the entire apartment plus the lampshades plus the upholstery plus a tree (don’t ask). What I’m trying to say is that my life sucks.

No wait, it doesn’t. But it is very, very, very, very busy, and when one is very, very, very, very busy one must prioritize. So, BEHOLD, my list of priorities:

1. Drinking Alcohol
2. Feeding Winston
3. Cooking and Eating Food
4. Sleeping
5. Reading
6. Traveling
7. Watching NewsRadio
8. Working
9.

10. Complaining about The Heat
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?. Going to the Movies
?+1. Calling My Mother

THAT SAID, the one movie that I cross my heart, hope to die, motherfucking PINKY SWEAR to see is this one. Duh.

9 comments:

Jennie said...

That party hat is my favorite thing ever.

I always seem to have no time but I don't really know what I'm doing that's making me so busy. Unless surfing the internet and watching reruns of Buffy count as being busy, in which case, I AM SO BUSY.

Joe G. said...

I forgive you.

kat said...

i tried to go last night but seth didn't come home early from work like he promised :(

Ashley said...

Winston probably used all that metaphorical sound for a litter box, didn't he? I know he did. Cats are crafty like that.

Ashley said...

BTW that was supposed to read "sand." This is what I get for typing in the middle of class.

Linda said...

What exactly does a ?+1 mean dear? Good things right?

kat said...

no worries! i talked to her today :)

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

That Harry Potter thing just hypnotized the living shit out of me.

eclectic said...

We should have seen it in Portland together! Oh right, it wasn't playing yet. STILL...!