Wednesday, 17 November 2010

Beam me up, Welshie.

Technology is for porn. Whether you're watching an old-timey fan dance in the penny arcade or whacking off in your popcorn at an adult theater or flashing your wang on Chatroulette or photoshopping Emma Watson's head on Megan Fox's body or WHATEVER, technology's sole purpose seems to be creating and disseminating porn. And now it seems our own government, under the auspices of "homeland security," is creating EVEN MORE PORN, this time starring you and me and poor little Emma Watson's actual body! Well I say EFF THAT.

Attention people who invent things! Get off of YouPorn and get to work on inventing that teleporter! And make it snappy! I have a long flight tomorrow and I'd just like to get there already.

Thanks.

6 comments:

Jennie said...

What the world needs now...is porn, sweet porn.

I don't know.

Heather Anne Hogan said...

Best post ever. Although I'm pretty sure I'm scarred for life about that Watson/Fox image.

eclectic said...

I wish that long flight with the pre-flight porn-shoot was bringing you to Wenatchee. But you're right... a teleporter would be better.

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

Worst. Porn. Ever.

mysterygirl! said...

Scanners are the worst. I haven't had to go through one yet but I'm a-scared for when I do.

Um, safe travels this weekend... :)

april said...

I'm sure that the teleporter is in the same secret room that the hoverboard is in. They have 'em and just aren't sharing 'em. I'm sure of it.