Thursday, 25 February 2010

Slap it up, flip it, rub it down, oh no!

So, Olympics, huh? I don't think I have a whole lot to say about them, which is good since I'm super crazy busy these days, so I'll try to get this all out of the way as quickly and painlessly as possible. I've been watching the hockey games (duh), and I am happy to say that after last night all of my Washington Capitals can finally come home to rest. Which is what they need way more than some stinking gold medal anyway. Maybe this will piss them off enough to win the Stanley Cup this year, in which case look for pictures of me at all the games smiling and cheering and highly intoxicated. Also, Mike Milbury can go stick his hand in a blender. While I press the puree button.

That snowboard and ski cross stuff is pretty gnarly, right? It's like total demolition derby out there. And is it just me, or are all the American women snowboarders and skiers (a) unbelievably gorgeous, and (b) incredibly obnoxious? I mean seriously, they all seem to have, like THE WORST, most petulant, most ridiculously bad attitudes EVER! Then again, if I were that pretty I'd probably be obnoxious too.

Speaking of skiers, Bode Miller is still a tool. Aksel Lund Svindal, on the other hand, is dreamy. I wish I could embed this video, but I can't so here's a link. Watch it.

Ice dancing is boring. And grossly incestuous.

The men's figure skaters' outfits filled me with glee. And which one is the mouthy American dude who didn't win a medal? I want to be BFFs with that dude.

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If McDonald's had this sauce year-round, I'd eat at McDonald's more than once every two years.

I should have written this while I was drunk; it would have been a whole lot funnier. Or weepier. Whatever.

SO. Last Saturday? Me and Seth and Mysterygirl! were gonna go curling? And it was gonna be so rad, you know? But when we got there they were full. So we went to a bar and drank Belgian beer and ate frites and a giant meat plate and two baskets of bread instead. If eating and drinking a lot of deliciousness was an Olympic sport, we would have totally brought home the gold.

USA! USA! USA!

8 comments:

sarah g said...

I have no video (of anything), let alone of the boy curling.

If eating and being a glutton ( i think I spelled that wrong), were a sport; America would win. Sad, but true.

peefer said...

I don't really understand all this hockey talk. Mostly, I'm jealous about the meat plate.

Heather Anne said...

I love this post in my deepest heart.

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

By curling do you mean the sawdust-tacular bar game that involves skill and cunning and strategy? I love that game, but inexplicably, North Carolina bars seem to have dropped the ball.

eclectic said...

So, eating & drinking deliciousness are going to be in the Summer Olympics then? Because I need to train harder.

Jennie said...

I could go for some McDonald's fries right now.

mysterygirl! said...

Sir, there was an Olympic-style curling event downtown, like with ice and everything! But we didn't get in in time. :(

That meat plate was amazing. I ate so much! U! S! A! U! S! A!

(Why don't we do this stuff more often?)

kat said...

seriously! we're in training here!

we'll have to hit up that happy hour more often.