Confession: Pizza is my favorite food. Hot pizza, cold pizza, frozen pizza, delivery pizza, wood-fired pizza, pita pizza, pizza bagel, pizza roll, I love pizza. In fact, I'm kind of a pizza expert.
Jersey Shore pizza
Pizza is magic, kind of like beer is magic: even when it's bad it's good.
French-Canadian pizza: really bad! But really good!
You may be wondering how pizza achieves this nearly miraculous miracle. Well, as a self-proclaimed and certified Pizza Expert, I am here to let you in on the secret.
Pizza in the car
The key to pizza is, in fact, really simple: toppings. Toppings are what make the pizza. Specifically these, the Three Best Pizza Toppings.
Topping Number One: Sauce
Sauce is key. Without sauce, your pizza is just plain old bread. I think we can all agree that your pizza deserves more.
Topping Number Two: Cheese
Pizza Mart pizza
Cheese is also extremely important. Without cheese, your pizza is wet bread. I think we can all agree that your pizza deserves more.
Topping Number Three: Anything Else
Bourbon Street pizza
Oh, shit. I forgot to finish this post. I blame my office firewall which has suddenly decided to BLOCK ALL OF BLOGGER. So if you notice a considerable drop-off in my commenting on your posts? That's why.
So... yeah. Put whatever else you want on your pizza except the following: broken glass, poison, used bandaids, asbestos, and kitty litter. Those would not be yummy.