Wednesday 14 January 2009

Product Review: Tia Maria.

So, here's my confession: I've got a lot going on right now and I'm having a really hard time pulling together a product review, so I did what any unself-respecting girl would do in my position. I whined for help. And help came curiously in my boyfriend's voice, who suggested this:



His theory is that Winston's "handsomeness" (boyfriend's choice of words, not mine) would trump any need for words, and really, DUH. But immediately after this proclamation our cat decided to prop his butt squarely on my boyfriend's head. So, you know, I'm on my own.

When given the task to review something I've never tried before, OF COURSE I'd go out and buy a bottle of liquor. And I did. Dave's friend Luke once told us that the traditional British post-Indian aperitif (yeah, I KNOW) is a Tia Maria, and a Tia Maria we once tried to drink, for TWO HOURS, at a fancy-schmancy Indian place here in the District. But we were thwarted, by (1) the poor service; and (2) the belated information that this fancy-schmancy Indian place here in the District DID NOT HAVE TIA MARIA. And so we have lived, ever under the myth of this apocryphal Tia Maria, until we ran into it at the liquor store.

It says:

With its intriguing blend of smooth coffee and vanilla tones, Tia Maria's secret Jamaican recipe reveals a timeless allure. Enjoy the deliciously versatile taste of Tia Maria mixed with cola, splashed over ice, or enjoyed richly in coffee.

When Seth first read me this description, I have to admit, the first person I thought of was Tamara, the one and only person who ever liked the [insert joke here] Coke [and here] (not my idea), and having tried said Coke Blak I was in no hurry to recreate the experience. So I did this:

Poured it over my homemade mocha chip gelato: "Oooo, yum," says Mariel.

Added it to the morning coffee: "THAT'S GOOD," says the boyfriend.

Drank it straight over ice while writing this review: "Oh man, I need some flouride," says I.

Next up: the boyfriend's nuts.


Take that for what you will.

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