It's a snap to find that one single person who fills your heart with joy

Many a month ago at Collective HQ, we committed to each writing a drunk post. Mine is in the manner of that Dear Old Love Tumblr, and you wouldn't believe it if I told you, but I spell better when I'm not sober.

Dear Old Love,

1) When you tell the story of your first kiss, do you mention that it only happened because your best friend gave me a candy bar -- making him a first grade pimp, and me a five-year-old hooker?

2) Sometimes I wonder if that box of treasure is still in your parents' back yard, buried in the exact spot we kissed and traded skateboard stickers.

3) You thought my family liked you because my grandma served you pie after we broke up, but my mom hated your guts from the very first time you parked in her spot.

4) My sister thought you had really big teeth, but I still think you're the most beautiful boy I've ever known.

5) There was never a guys-out-of-the-dorm-by-ten rule.

6) We should have known by the sheer amount of poetry written and read (instead of actual sex had) how very, very gay we both were.

7) Your chest hair was like a sweater, and you know what? Gross, man.

8) I'll never forget how sweet you were, that song you sang, at the funeral of Carl, my orange hermit crab.

9) Your eyes seemed to me to express more than all the words I had read in my entire life.

10) If I had it to do all over again, I wouldn't, 'cause I didn't know hearts could actually break like that.

11) I'd give up my seat on the Hogwarts Express for you, as long as you promise to come back home to me.

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If you missed it over the weekend, check out Jennie!'s interview with Owly creator Andy Runton!