Thursday, 2 February 2012

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together...mass hysteria!

Jennie   You know what really drives me crazy? When I completely lose track of what day it is and forget to write my Collective post. I lose track of what day it is almost every week, though, especially toward the end of the week, when my brain gets mushier and mushier. I’m usually OK on Monday and Tuesday and then by Wednesday, I’m all, “It’s Friday, right? It feels like it must be Friday so it has to be Friday because if there are more days in this week, I don’t know what I’ll do. DEAR GOD WHY ISN’T IT FRIDAY.”

So get ready for some crap, internets, because I have about ten minutes to write this! I wrote a little bit about this on my blog earlier this week, but the weather here in Ohio has been balls out crazy all winter. It was 60 yesterday. In February! I was outside, walking around with no coat on! What is happening? Is this the end of the world? I mean, that sucks and all, but if the weather is going to be this beautiful, I’m kind of OK with it.

What worries me is that today is Groundhog Day and the groundhog saw his shadow and got scared (pussy) so we definitely have six more weeks of winter (I mean, it’s science) but does that mean six more weeks from now or six more weeks of ACTUAL winter? Because I feel like we’ve only had a couple of weeks of actual winter so far. If that. I think I’ve only cursed the snow and ice once this winter, which is about ten times behind schedule so I’m not sure what’s going to happen. THE FIRST RULE OF WINTER CLUB IS DON’T TALK ABOUT WINTER CLUB OH JUST KIDDING WINTER CLUB POOPS ON RULES AHHHHHH!

You guys, if winter lasts until April, I really will go crazy. Like FOR REAL, set-my-name-on-fire-on-the-front-lawn, make-sculptures-out-of-my-own-hair, paint-the-walls-with-human-waste CRAZY. And I don’t think Joe wants to clean that up. We’d have to move and we just did that and if we had to do it again I’D GO EVEN CRAZIER.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Happy Groundhog Day.



kat said...

Watch that first step... it's a DOOZY.

Jennie said...


I can't stop saying that. I have a problem.

eclectic said...

I think, since there are actual buds on my magnolia tree, that Punxatawney Phil is a charlatan. Also, if you have to move, please move here. Thanks.

Kiti said...

In the annals of strange winter weather, in 2010, it snowed in April here in Columbus. And if it's 60 F today, it could easily be 20 F tomorrow. So my point is: I live in Ohio, too, and I'm just as confused as you are.

Jennie said...

Ohio weather is always crazy but this seems crazier than normal. I guess Ohio has a lot of feelings this winter.

Heather Anne Hogan said...

@kat +1million

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

Ohio weather: 100% chance of wind with a 60% chance of it wafting the stench of manure across the plain.

I think Buffalo and North Dakota are the only places that had winter this year.

Jennie said...

Screw you, winter! Smell ya later!

I don't know.

kat said...

actually, i don't think buffalo had that much winter this year.

Kiti said...

Sir - Eastern Europe is also seeing a particularly brutal winter this year.

When I moved to Ohio, I was asking about the climate, and several people quoted to me this maxim: "If you don't like the weather, wait 5 minutes--it will change."