Monday 15 June 2009

There's nothing on my horizon except everything. Everything is on my horizon.

heather One of my most annoying habits is this sort of insatiable need I have to ask questions. And one of the reasons I love hanging out with the Collective is that they are so patient with me, answering every inquiry I can dream up for hours and hours at a time.

Abigail, bless her, tries her hardest, but she hates the question game more than anything else in the world. See, because: a) She can't make a decision without gathering every shred of information about a given subject. (Seriously, I've seen her go to, like, page SEVEN of Google results.) And b) She likes to keep her options open.

Abigail would never laminate her List of Five, is what I am saying.

I'm always like, "Just answer it! It's not the SATs! And it's not chiseled in stone! Just because you say you'd rather bonk Daniel Craig doesn't mean you can't bonk Zach Levi given the chance!"

Anyway, what I mean is that I am kind of an ass about the question game, but this week's Collective topic makes me feel like Schilbo. Topic: One thing I wish I could do...

My first thought, of course, is fly. Not just because of my superhero/messiah complex, but also for practicality, and just think about how small my carbon footprint would be! Plus, international travel becomes half-price when you don't have to factor in airfare. And, I'd be able to hang out with the CollectiveIRL whenever I want.

But then there are other things I wish I could do. Like, I'd like to build a tree house, a big one, to use as an office. And I'd like to take a Harry Potter train trip, even though I'm kind of too old for it now. I wish I could own a real, working farm. We'd farm beagles probably. Plus Kat wants some goats, so we'd have those too. I wish I could write like Haven Kimmel, or Jacob from TWoP. I wish I could do magic, travel to Middle Earth, write a really good YA fiction novel, cure my mom's craziness, play basketball with Pat Summitt, have a British accent, find all five 2002 Gotham Girls comic books in a set for framing, take my whole family on a vacation to London, backpack in the Amazon (with a guide), conquer my fear of bears.

Oh, also sword fights. I wish I could sword fight!

And draw comics, for real -- and be great at it.

And take professional photos.

And figure out how to work the six remote controls in my living room.

I think they call this empathy, how suddenly you understand how another person feels from the inside. So, um, sorry Abigail. You don't have to play the question game anymore.

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