Tuesday 5 August 2008

Let's be honest, this is really Kat's turf.

Abs

I could only think of two things.

Hang on my pants are on fire. Okay, I thought of four things, but I forgot two of them.

In my quest to find my neuroses to show you I stumbled across many a thing that aren't neurotic, but do make me weird. Like all the reasons why I'm an asshole, and how everyone annoys me, and how I'm impatient and lazy. But besides that, I am SO BREEZY.

Except about my laundry.

First of all, I have a TON of clothes. Literally. I think you could weigh my clothes and they would total a ton. At least. I love buying clothes more than anything else (I would give up Starbucks for clothes if I had to) and I spend a lot of time going through bargain racks at Old Navy and scouring the internet for deals. I know I should buy less clothes, but I don't want to.

I don't like to wash my clothes very often because did you know the more you wash (and dry) something the more it fades? That is one of the reasons why I have so many clothes. The more I buy the longer they last. It's a miracle! So I painstakingly go through my wardrobe, wearing every single thing at least once to prolong the life of each individual item. And also because I'm a procrastinator.

I can go about six weeks without doing laundry. SIX EFFING WEEKS.

Then, when laundry day comes, dun dun dunnnnnnnnn, I load up the entire trunk of my Explorer with all my dirty laundry and go to the laundromat. Then, I sort everything over a long row of eight washers. I sort by color and shade and water temperature and then I start them all at the same time. When everything is washed, I put two loads in the dryer (sheets, towels, sweatshirts) and take the rest home to air dry. WHO AIR DRIES SIX LOADS OF LAUNDRY? CRAZY PEOPLE, THAT'S WHO.

(I do have that much underwear. I swear.)

The other thing is small and insignificant, but why, WHY, in all of God's green Earth, would anyone choose, CHOOSE, to sort their iTunes in any order other than by album? Now that's crazy talk.

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