Internet, meet Neville Longbottom.
'Gran, I've lost my toad again.'
'And you should have seen their faces when I got in here – they thought I might not be magical enough to come, you see.'
'I'm worth twelve of you, Malfoy.'
'They went for Filch first, and everyone knows I'm almost a Squib.'
'I expect gran'd want me to try, though, she's always going on about how I should be upholding the family honour. I'll just have to – oops…'
Luna: 'And I don't know who you are.'
'I'm nobody,' said Neville hurriedly.
'No, you're not,' said Ginny sharply.
'Neville Longbottom – Luna Lovegood…'
'Mimbulus mimbletonia,' he said proudly.
'Expelliarmus!' said Neville, and Harry, caught unawares, felt his wand fly out of his hand.
'I DID IT!' said Neville gleefully. 'I've never done it before – I DID IT!'
But Neville had already stretched out his hand, into which his mother dropped an empty Droobles Blowing Gum wrapper.
'Very nice, dear,' said Neville's grandmother in a falsely cheery voice, patting his mother on the shoulder. But Neville said quietly, 'Thanks, Mum.'
'We're coming with you, Harry."
'My gran's going do kill be,' said Neville thickly, blood spattering from his nose as he spoke, 'dat was by dad's old wand....'
'He's dot alone!' shouted a voice from above them. 'He's still god be!
'STUBEFY!' shouted Neville, wheeling around and waving Hermione's wand at the oncoming Death Eaters. 'STUBEFY, STUBEFY!'
'The odd thing is, Harry,' he said softly, 'that it may not have meant you at all. Sybil's prophecy could have applied to two wizard boys, born at the end of July that year, both of whom had parents in the Order of the
"It's high time your grandmother learned to be proud of the grandson she's got, rather than the one she thinks she ought to have."
In one swift, fluid motion, Neville broke free of the Body-Bind Curse upon him; the flaming hat fell off him and he drew from its depths something silver, with a glittering rubied handle—
The slash of the silver blade could not be heard over the roar of the oncoming crowd or the sound of the clashing giants or of the stampeding centaurs, and yet it seemed to draw every eye. With a single stroke Neville sliced off the great snake's head, which spun high into the air, gleaming in the light flooding from the entrance hall, and Voldemort's mouth was open in a scream of fury no one could hear, and the snake's body thudded to the ground at his feet—
Internet, meet the Top 11 songs on Neville Longbottom's iPod.
My Father's Gun, Elton John
Eye of the Tiger, Survivor
Highway to the Danger Zone, Kenny Loggins
Don't Stop Believin', Journey
I Predict a Riot, Kaiser Chiefs
It Ain't Over 'Til it's Over, Lenny Kravitz
Hit Me With Your Best Shot*, Pat Benatar
Happiness, The Weepies
What a Feeling** Irene Cara
Ruby***, Kaiser Chiefs
The Beginning After the End, Stars
What do you think? Did I miss any of Neville's songs?
*I own! this song on Guitar Hero.
**If it weirds you out to watch Bette Porter gyrating around like that, I apologize. Of course, if it weirds you out to watch Bette Porter gyrating around you probably don't watch The L Word and therefore have no idea who Bette Porter is.
***Also an appropriate song for Ron Weasley.